Croissan’Wich Confessions

GRAVITY Experiment Days #44, #45 & #46 – wow, I’m behind!

Today’s weight:  143.0 (I weighed 3 times just to make sure this was legit)

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  7.5 / 7.5

Exercise:  Day of rest today and boy was it glorious!!!  Friday was a brisk walk on the treadmill for 30 min (interval training as usual) and yesterday was nothing more than the activity involved with having a birthday party for my almost 9-year-old – Sam’s Club trip, moving and setting up tables, vacuuming/cleaning, etc (I actually broke a sweat doing this).

I haven’t been completely honest with those of you who continue to read my posts so I’m finally going to come clean.  I have continued to drink Diet Coke and eat McDonald’s breakfast burritos throughout this experiment.  There I said it.  Ahhh, I feel so much better.  It’s not that I’ve lied, I just haven’t talked about those things for more than a month so that’s a pretty good sign that I’m not doing so great in that department.

About a week into the experiment, a friend texted me with the following message – “I ate a frozen fruit cup (homemade) this morn instead of sandwich!  Thought it might make u smile”  Like my breakfast burrito addiction, this friend is drawn to the Burger King Croissan’Wich.

We have discussed at length the draw of the fast food fix in the morning – we both head to the drive-thru after a usual hectic morning packing lunches, prepping backpacks, getting the kids out the door, bickering (usually between the kids but sometimes involving us), and getting ourselves ready.  The protein and calories I get in the morning, while not of the best quality, keep me going all morning.  I don’t snack.  I don’t yawn.  And if I get swamped and can’t get lunch, I’m not miserable all day.  I’m still searching for a viable alternative so suggestions are welcome ;-)

So after I got the message, I felt like I had failed her but she would eventually find out if I had fibbed so my return message read – “Funny – I had a breakfast burrito and hashbrown;-)”  Her response, “Lolol…well my sugar count is probably worse with the mtn dew but u can’t win everyday:)”

This totally made my day.  In my quest for perfection and being this pillar of will power throughout this experiment, she made me laugh and realize it’s okay to be human while I’m figuring all of it out.

My weight and stress have both gone down as I’ve eased up on myself.  Funny – the more I’ve become my own friend in this process, the easier it’s become.

Cat in the Fat

GRAVITY Experiment Day #43

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  6.0 / 9.0

Exercise:  30 min GRAVITY training – feeling a little stagnant with my routine today but lest the show must go on

THIS ONE MIGHT BE GROSS TO SOME SO PROCEED WITH CAUTION!!!

Okay, let’s talk about fat.  When I was in physical therapy school, our first class was gross anatomy.  I remember the anxiety and unnecessary worry (see yesterday’s post) that I experienced prior to that infamous first day when we had to select a body to dissect.  There were six cadavers to choose from and all of them were bagged so we were choosing blindly.

Our group picked “Rosa” – she ended up looking like a sweet, Italian grandmother who was as big in diameter as she was in height.  Oh, dear Rosa.  We were so indebted to her by the end of the class.  Her death (but then gift to science) meant that we learned more than she will ever know.

Beyond Rosa’s muscles, bones, and organs, she taught me about fat.  Good gracious – Rosa had every type of fat known to man.  I have dissected bumpy fat, lumpy fat, icky fat, sticky fat, slimy fat, grimy fat, mushy fat, and gushy fat.  Wonder if Dr. Seuss ever wrote a book about fat?

Needless to say, I didn’t eat fried foods for nearly a year after that class.  But now we hear a lot about good fat and bad fat.  What’s the diff?

Fat – love it or hate it, we need it.  It helps form every cell, insulates our nerves, keeps us warm, balances our hormones, keeps skin and arteries supple, and lubricates joints.  The key is recognizing which type of fat our body needs and how much of it we require.

Saturated fats are not your friend.  These are the fats that are hard at room temp – they are harder to digest and tend to be full of cholesterol.  They come from animals and are found in meat, eggs and cheese.  Unsaturated fats are liquid at room temperature and can be further divided into two groups - monounsaturated fats (Omega 9) such as olive oil OR polyunsaturated fats (Omega 3 and Omega 6 fatty acids) such as sunflower oil.

Omega 6 (safflower oil, sunflower oil, pumpkin oil, sesame oil) and Omega 3 (mackerel, salmon, tuna, flax seed oil) are the ones you really want in your diet to fulfill your fat need.

So here’s the skinny on fat:

  1. The ideal body-fat ratio should be approximately 19-26% of a woman’s body weight and 12-18% of a man’s body weight.
  2. There are two different types of body fat (brown and yellow).  Brown fat is situated inside the body and is “active” – it contains cell structures that produce heat and burn energy.  Yellow fat is found nearer the surface and is “less active” and more likely to accumulate.  Women tend to have a higher ratio of yellow fat than men – of course.
  3. Women need higher levels of fat because it is essential for reproduction and so the body stores it “just in case” – joy yet again.
  4. An average healthy intake of good fats in the diet should be approximately 30-40 grams a day.  The fat content of diets in affluent populations can be nearly four times this amount.  Yikers!
  5. Heat, light and oxygen destroy essential fatty acids, which is why it is best to keep oils in dark containers.
  6. Essential fats (Omega 3 and Omega 6) must come from the diet because your body cannot produce them.
  7. Weight for weight, fat provides more than twice the amount of usable energy than carbohydrates or protein (you’ll find 9 calories in every gram of fat).
  8. Fat contributes to the palatability, texture, and smell of many foods – amen to that!  It also slows down the process of digestion providing an extended period of ”feeling full” after a meal.

Fat can be fabulous but when choosing between green eggs and ham and one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish – go for the fish ;-)

I.m R.eally S.tressed

GRAVITY Experiment Day #42

Today’s weight:  144.5

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  6.0 / 9.0

Exercise:  30 min walking / interval training on the treadmill as previous

We got a tax notice from the IRS on Monday.  This within an hour of putting money down on a piece of property.  Don’t things always happen that way?  The envelope was really thick so I automatically panicked.  I had reason to after I opened it up.

Knowing nil about taxes, I worried all night Monday.  I worried more Tuesday after I got word from my husband that he got absolutely nowhere talking to them.  The first time he called, their computers were down and the second time they wouldn’t give him any information because I had to be the one calling.  Of course that info wasn’t given to him while he waited on hold for 15 minutes.

After waiting on hold my obligatory 15 minutes this morning, I was distraught.  In 3½ years in business, we haven’t goofed when it’s come to tax stuff.  This error was legitimate and we learned a lot to prevent the same error from happening.

It was how I was treated that was appalling.  The lady was extremely rude to me on the phone – imagine that from the IRS ;-)   From the get go, I was the enemy.  At one point, I stated while crying, “Ma’am, it is very scary to receive a tax notice from the IRS.  You are going to need to quit speaking to me with a condescending tone if we are going to accomplish anything.  If you can’t do that, then I need to talk to someone else.”

My mountain ended up being a molehill, yet again.  What a waste of my time and energy.  One of these days I’m going to actually apply this knowledge.

Lessons learned in dealing with the IRS:

1)      They are some scary dudes so avoid dealing with them if at all possible.

2)      Put your big girl panties on if forced to deal with them.

3)      If #1 and #2 don’t work, cry (evidently it’s effective at getting all penalties and fees removed) :-)

Good Hair Day, or Not

GRAVITY Experiment Days #40 & #41

Today’s weight:  145.0

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  5.5 / 9.5

Exercise:  30 min of laser tag (this did include fast walking up and down ramps, several deep squats, and lots of laughing – I was sweating like a pig); 20 min of sweeping two driveways and two sidewalks in jungle humidity – I’m calling it a day with that

We’ve been really busy over the past week (like everyone else) so it’s a struggle for me to even get in front of the computer.  So this post is a completely random thought that has been floating around in my head today.  I have been using this blog as a collection of stories and fun stuff that happens in our family as a memoir of sorts for my kids.  I want them to know what their mom thinks and the deep emotional side of my soul.

So here are my deep thoughts of the day:  Does it qualify as “a good hair day” if nobody sees you?  Or better yet, is your great new haircut really that great if you can never get it to look like the hairdresser did?

Okay, discuss amongst yourselves… ;-)

Wo(man) Moments

GRAVITY Experiment Day #39

Today’s weight:  145.0

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  5.5 / 9.5

Exercise:  Day of rest and I just got done eating popcorn – I’ve been craving it all day;-)

Church was great this morning.  Our pastor and his wife started a new sermon series called “Beautiful” – the series is mainly aimed at women and is giving us perspective about what true beauty is and how God sees us.  It was reiterated that for women, everything affects everything (oh, so true).  I define myself by my appearance, home, career, relationships, and children – when one of those areas isn’t just right, it affects everything else.  Instead, I should be viewing me as God views me. 

Because the series is so estrogen-ized, they have decided to interject “Man Moments” where they show clips of things being blown up, people getting punched, guns being shot, and guys jumping off and out of things.  So funny.

I must admit that I enjoyed the man moment.  I’m secure enough in my femininity that I can say without shame that I like to shoot things.  Yet another traumatic moment for my children last Mother’s Day when I got a Ruger handgun – imagine Mommy pulling heat out of a flowered bag stuffed with pastel tissue paper (still in the running for Mother-of-the-Year by the way).  I’ve always wanted to get my permit to carry a concealed weapon and I got it last year – now if I could find a Vera Bradley bag that had a cute pocket for my .357 ;-)

I think it’s really hard for most women to confront their feelings about beauty and self-worth.  I think I needed the break just as much as the guys.  I know that I struggle with many of the things talked about this morning.  Our pastor’s wife offered practical suggestions to make this easier but it’s definitely a process.

During this experiment, it’s been tough not to let a number or missing a workout get me down.  As I’ve eased up on myself, I feel like it’s gotten easier and more manageable but I know I’ll have my seasons.

For now, I’ll just go target shooting while I work through my emotions.

“Clap on! Clap off!”

GRAVITY Experiment Days #37 & #38

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  4.0 / 11.0

Exercise:  Great workout – doubled up because I missed yesterday;-(  I went 22 minutes / 5000+ meters on the WaterRower; 10 min jog on the treadmill with one hill interval for 2 min; at least 30 min on the Total Gym (squat jumps, squats with toes out, squat bridges, sitting torso twists, single bicep curls, scrunch board work, chest presses); Get-Delt-With-It, Roman lifts, squat push ups, gluteal series, prisoner squats, and ab series.  I’ve noticed that I sweat more when I do my GRAVITY training than I do with cardio (just an observation).

For those of you who have children in school, you are well aware that this is one of the most hectic times of the year.  Between testing, year-end field trips, award ceremonies, field days, concerts, and the general excitement of summer break being within reach, it’s a miracle we remember our names (much less our children’s).

When I was at my children’s elementary school on Tuesday for an award ceremony, I stopped in the office to sign my oldest daughter out for a special lunch with Mom.  While I had every intention of doing this back in the fall, life happened and here we were during the last week of school squeezing it in;-)  I showed my ID and off we went to Captain D’s (her choice).

While we were enjoying our seafood amongst the patrons (average age of 77 – just guessing), I got a call from my mom who teaches at my children’s school.  She informed me that I had left my wallet lying in the office at the school and that she’d keep it safe for me until we returned.

In recent years, I would have blamed this on “Mommy brain.”  I seriously believe that with each progressive child, mothers sacrificially lose brain cells.  I’m living proof.  But, I’m beginning to believe that it’s just me.  I need a “clapper” for everything – my car keys, the checkbook, the remote, my wallet, my debit card in my purse, my phone, the children occasionally.  I want someone to invent a device where I can clap my hands like I’m doing the Mexican hat dance and the item in question beeps to reveal its location.

Original “The Clapper” ad (can’t miss the lady at the end):  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XUOhjW2AXM

My wallet’s the worst though.  When I was in high school, I was shopping for a new purse at a department store in Fairview Heights, IL.  I wanted to make sure that my wallet would fit so I tested it out.  Mom and I were on a whirlwind shopping trip that day and we decided to hit Crestwood Plaza in St. Louis, MO, also.  When I started to try out purses again, I went to perform the same wallet test only my wallet was nowhere to be found.  Panic.  Needless to say, it was hanging right where I left it in the next state over.  The saleswoman thought it was funny.  Mom, not so much.  That’s the day I learned how fast she can drive;-)

So what does this have to do with working out, health, and this whole experiment?  Everything.  I thought that I would never look forward to working out, eating healthy, and losing weight again - my track record is that I either ignore it or I take it too far.  I’m finding that this is something I can change and manage in a healthy way.  I’ve loosened up a bit in the last few weeks but I haven’t chucked it.  I also haven’t beaten myself up or looked at myself as a failure.  I’ve just kept on keepin’ on and the scale and I are coming to terms with each other;-)  This makes me think I can tackle some other habits that plague me.

Maybe, some day, I’ll come to terms with my forgetfulness…or someone can just expand on that clapper idea;-)

My First Cavity

GRAVITY Experiment Day #36

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  4.0 / 11.0

Exercise:  I haven’t exercised yet today and I was planning on walking after I get home tonight but it is pouring rain (again).  I’ll probably opt for a lighter workout tonight consisting of 30 min of light jogging on the treadmill mixed with rowing on the WaterRower.  My plan is to go to a 5:15 a.m. circuit class in the morning so I don’t want to be wiped out going into that.

Today was a milestone for me – I had my first cavity filled.  I had a great track record for 33 years but that has all come to an end.  After being numbed, I informed my beloved dentist that I could feel him touching my gum and that I was very concerned about the pain factor.  I love how both he and the hygienist discreetly moved that giganto needle in a way that you can’t really make eye contact with it – very sneaky.

Anyway, he numbed me up really well.  So much so that I couldn’t feel the entire left side of my face.  Totally cool with me because I didn’t want to feel anything – thanks Dr. Tony;-)  Even though I had considered asking for gas, it really wasn’t that bad.

Then came recovery.  My appointment was at noon so my husband, having had many a filling over the years, suggested I eat before I went in.  No time so it was going to have to wait.  I ran a few errands with slurred speech and drool but my stomach started growling and I couldn’t ignore it anymore.

I thought about what would taste good and since my jaw was sore and I didn’t feel like chewing, I opted for a low-fat frozen yogurt cone from McDonald’s.  I can eat those things in my sleep so it was the logical choice.  I noticed that I was licking to the right quite a bit but for the most part I handled it with ease – no drips, no drool.  It even tasted good on the right side of my tongue.

My best friend Kim posted on her blog yesterday how two men (complete strangers) had randomly waved and smiled at her recently.  You have to understand that Kim is beautiful, bubbly, and a people magnet so I can completely understand why this would occur – but this never happens to me (see Post titled (Lack of) Passion is Contagious).  Imagine my surprise when the lady next to me at the stop light looked over and grinned.  I grinned back with the right side of my mouth and drove on.

Turning into traffic, I looked up into my rearview mirror.  I caught a quick glimpse that made me do a double take.  Not only did I have a huge glob of yogurt on my lip but I had two streaks of melting white goo all the way down the left side of my neck to my collar.

Sweet (literally).

The Last 10%

GRAVITY Experiment Day #35 (my math’s a little off – cut me some slack because we are neck-deep in end-of-the-school-year stuff with three kids)

Today’s weight:  146.5

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  4.0 / 11.0

Exercise:  30 min GRAVITY training on the Total Gym; 30 min intervals on the treadmill – 4.4 mph at 0% grade for 2 min alternating with 11% grade for 2 min

One of my favorite bloggers Seth Godin had a great post today titled “Hardly worth the effort.”  It’s definitely worth the read if you have a few – I’ve listed the link under my Blogroll at the right.

While the blog mostly deals with marketing and customer service,  a lot of the points he makes can be related to life in general.  This particular post talks about how much work must be put into the last 10% of quality (i.e. getting your golf score from 77 to 70 is more difficult than getting it from 120 to 113 or 84 to 77).

The first thing that popped into my head was losing weight.  After reading the post, I though it was ironic that I was trying to lose 10% of my body weight.  The last 10-15 pounds are tough to conquer.  Lord knows I’ve not been able to accomplish this goal for 15 years!  But I never anticipated it getting progressively more difficult as I got closer to the end…

Beyond weight loss though, how often do we set out to accomplish a goal and do it halfway or give up along the way?  I have no problem with the last 10% when it’s something I enjoy or something I excel at…but the real reward comes when I go further than 90% with the tasks that are tough.  For me, this includes losing weight, parenting, dealing with difficult people, etc. (I could go on and on).

I find though that people get critical as you branch into the last 10% (and even more as you near the last 1-2%).  Godin states, “The hard part is the last ten percent, sure, or even the last one percent, but it’s the hard part because everyone is busy doing the easy part already.”

The last 10% might require 90% of your time and effort – the tough part is determining what is worth figuring out all this math.

Clean Up on Aisle 9

GRAVITY Experiment Day #34

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  3.5 / 11.5

Exercise:  I’ll double up tomorrow.  Okay, I did demo a bunch of exercises to patients today but I hardly got my heart rate up.  My blood pressure was 98/55 and resting heart rate was 62 bpm yesterday at Sam’s which are both improvements for me so this exercise thing is doing something;-)

I’ve done some stupid stuff in my day.  Beyond naked cartwheels, I have a few events in my past that I’ll never forget.  These events shape who we are and give rise to our quirks and nervous habits as adults.

Case in point – shopping carts.  I have a phobia of “buggies” (that’s what they call them in the South).  So you have kids and suddenly the shopping cart becomes your worst enemy.  I’ll never forget looking away from our first kiddo for a second and turning around to find her swabbing her mouth across the cart handle like a harmonica.  That was before all those fancy covers they have now.  The kid hasn’t missed a day of school in years so I think every child should lick a buggie for immunity’s sake (not really but it’s another step closer to that Mother-of-the-Year award).

My fear of all things buggie started when I was in kindergarten.  I was always a huge “help” to my Mom when she went to the booming metropolis of Waterloo, Illinois, to do the grocery shopping.  I liked to go because there was a checker-patterned tile floor around the periphery of the store that was fun to follow like the yellow brick road.  Then there were those cool carts.  This particular store had the high, shallow carts where there was enough room for a child to sit under the basket.

That was my favorite spot when I got tired from skipping around to see the Wizard.  One day I must have been super tired because I laid down under the cart.  Usually I had my waist-long hair up in Laura Ingalls braids but not this particular day.  I let out a yelp as Mom kept rolling along while my blond locks got wound tightly around the cart’s wheels and pinned my head against the metal.

Clean up on Aisle 9 was right.  They had to invert the cart and stand me up as they attempted to unwind my mangled mane.  Mom was the picture of calmness – much better than I would have been with one of mine currently;-)  That was the end of my free rides.  My long hair ended shortly thereafter.

From that day on, I’ve thought shopping carts were from the devil.  Good grief – they run over toes, they dent cars, and they contaminate innocent children.

I also learned one of my best coping strategies in that moment – when life has you wound up and pinned, change your hairstyle.

Let Me Explain

GRAVITY Experiment Day #33 (I’ll explain)

Today’s weight:  147.0 (I’ll explain)

Pounds lost / pounds to go:  3.5 / 11.5

Exercise:  Day of rest

Okay, I’m modifying the experiment a bit.  After I hit my lowest weight of 145.5 last week, I weighed the next day to find that I was at 148.5.  Physically impossible to me since my diet and exercise have been very consistent.  I was frankly pretty disgusted and thought about throwing in the towel – instead I decided to take a few days hiatus.  I didn’t chuck my exercise and diet changes but I did not weigh for a few days to get my mind off of it.

So I’ve decided that I’m only weighing 2x per week from here on out (on Sunday which is today and Wednesday).  This is hard for me since I am a scale addict.  Weighing every day has gotten me a bit obsessed which is not a good thing for an individual with OCD;-)

I haven’t posted because my blog was the spinning plate I had to let break this week.  Things around the house, work demands, and a deadline all had me stretched a bit too thin.  Blogging has definitely been an outlet for me and I never want it to become yet another thing I “have to do.”

This experiment has taught me a few things so far:

  1. Behavior can be changed even when you think it’s impossible.
  2. The steps taken to achieve one goal may help you accomplish another.
  3. It’s okay to break (or change) the rules – especially when you’re the one making them;-)

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